If you have kids, especially toddlers, you know they can say some funny and weird things. My son Ayden, being my son, can say some really off the wall stuff. Enjoy!
"A monster took my beer! Come here monster! Give me back my beer!"
"My poop wants to stay in my butt."
"The grasshopper barfed on me."
"Mommy, I want the spider in my eye."
"He's not dead, mommy. He's just sleeping. He's okay." (said after he squished a bug)
"Stop being loud or the emergency will come and take you to jail."
"Yesterday, at school, there was an alligator and he ate me." (he doesn't go to school)
"Daddy, come fold laundry with me." (yes, he likes folding laundry)
"You can't take off my head 'cause it has bones in it. And then I'd be a zombie."
"Zombies eat babies."
"I saw a zombie and I said oh no a zombie no!!! And I shot him! You shoot the zombies!"
"The zombie will come and get you and make you dead."
"Zan the icky poop dog!" (which is true)
"Spiderman is proud of me for pooping. Zan isn't proud. She poops outside."
"Look mommy! Jesus has a slide! I wanted to go there . . ." (said anytime we pass a church)
I know I'm going to be getting A LOT of phone calls when he goes to preschool, kindergarten, grade school . . . . .
But like I said, he is my son, so it's only natural!