Sunday, September 5, 2010

Frustrated

Do you know how annoying it is to be on meds for bipolar and still be having hypomania? It's getting old. At first, I was all about the hypomanic states. I had tons of energy, I was always in a good mood, quick to laugh . . . it was kinda nice. Especially compared to my depression.
But the mania is now becoming a nuissance. I'm getting more and more inappropriate at work, cussing a lot more, and feeling unstable in my moods.
NOT a good sign.
I have yet to find a psychiatrist who is accepting new patients and my PA I've been seeing, she's great, but psych is not her specialty. I'm worried I'll have to switch up my meds and start all over.
So it's frustrating, to say the least. I have to make a very strong conscious effort to keep control of my behavior. And it's getting tiresome. I'm at the point where I don't really know what to do. I've been wanting to go out less and less because I'm worried about how I'll act.
And as I'm writing this, I feel like I'm going to cry, whereas this morning I was hyper and manic. I'm cycling rapidly.
If y'all have any suggestions, I'd love to hear them.

1 comment:

MAB Jewelry said...

I don't have any suggestions, but I do adore you, and send you kitteny hugs from Ohio. Feel better. You are such an amazing lady.